this is a blog about memory keeping, funny stories & baked goods i make, and do my best not to eat. proper capitalization is always optional.

1.31.2012

rak: january

one of my goals for 2012 was to do a random act of kindness.
also known as a RAK.
i have hopes that each month i'm able to do MORE than one...
but i have to be realistic about our single-income budget.
(sometimes i have visions/delusions of grandeur)

the whole idea of doing a RAK each month came from a few different blogs,
where the bloggers were doing SEVERAL acts of kindness on their birthdays.
(turning 29 = 29 RAK to be carried out that day)
realistically, for me, with a baby in tow..
running around town doing 33 acts in one day seemed like a disaster waiting to happen.
so i settled on incorporating MORE throughout the year.
mostly because it always feels good to do something nice for someone..
but more because i realized we were TELLING the dude to think of others before himself..
but in truth we didn't have a ton of opportunities to SHOW him what that felt like.
seeking out these opportunities, i hope, will not only encourage him to be thoughtful,
but will teach him to look to the world around him, and ask 'what can i do?'

 i thought about who around me i could bestow some random kindness on.
i am blessed beyond measure with some wonderful people in my life. 
family members & friends.
but when i searched my heart, i found my thoughts were drawn to one incredibly kind person.
my friend andrea, who i've never met in real life, nor spoken to in person.
the internet can be a wonderful place sometimes.
she is the same age as me, and sometimes there is wisdom beyond her years in her advice.
we've talked about our boys (she's a mama of two boys as well)
we've talked about behavior of said boys.
we've talked about marriage.
blogs.
style (her fabulous, my lack of)
project life.
masking tape.
music.
twilight.
we've talked about it all.

her words have soothed & help heal me more than a few times.
(i'm not sure she even knows that)
she's been the upbeat, positive voice in my head when i'm doubting my abilities.
and for all that, i wanted to do something for her.

she's a project lifer & i decided that i would break in my silhouette by making up some goodies for her.
(using my gift, to gift to someone else ;)


fonts: bebas, blackout, my topher, cursive standards  & heydings icon (camera)
silouette shapes: television, weekday/weekend tags, set of 3 banners, tag, frame, word bubble, days border

i mailed off her package with a big smile on my face
& a HUGE tingle in my heart.
 i'm looking forward to february's RAK.
(i already know what i'm doing! :)

happy tuesday!
xo-k

1.27.2012

diy: valentine crafts

i'm not sure if valentine's crafts are in the cards for me this year.
i am HOPING to do SOMETHING...
but as of right now, i got nothing planned.
..........yep. nothing.

so i thought i'd link up some of my valentine's projects from last year..
because the lack of craftiness around here is getting disgusting.
(i need those darn page protectors already...)



this was my little present to mason last year.
it has been well loved, & the box could probably stand replacing!


this was our gift to mason teacher last year.
just a store bought plastic cup, all glittered up for valentine's day.


a little felt applique on a onesie for the dude.
he was my little co-pilot for the day, making trips with me to drop off goodies to loved ones.


this was the little piece that started my obsession for the year.
an inkpad, a pen, & some wiggly little fingers & your done.


mason's class treats.
they were recycled plastic baby food containers,
filled with fudge & topped with valentine's sprinkles.
so cute, and a great way to get rid of some of my stash of stuff to re-purpose!



just a few coats of spray paint, some mod podge & glitter.
(this kid cracks me up!)

here's to hoping i find my inner craftiness!

have a great weekend!
xo-k

1.26.2012

book: charlotte figg takes over paradise

we are just 26 days into the new year, and already i have 8 books under my belt.
i'm pretty proud of myself.
even if say, 5 of those books are young adult paranormal romance books.
it's still 8 books.
and to be honest, i'm kinda over the paranormal stuff right now.
i can't put my finger on why..
but i need books that are real right now.
books about real people, doing real things, overcoming real life.
i need real right now, even if it's hard.
even if the stories break my heart.
i need to hear them.
i need to be changed by them.

ever feel that way?
maybe it's just me.
i want to read 'the help' so badly,
but i'm still saving my amazon gift card for those dang design a project life page protectors.
until then, i'm still on the free ebook trip.
but you know what, it's not so bad.

i just finished 'charlotte figg takes over paradise' last night.
and i'm telling ya, it's running a close second to 'maids of misfortune' for the front runner in favorites.
but i guess as they are entirely different books, they can both occupy the numero uno spot for now.


i'm a big fannie flagg fan.
i bet you are familiar with her work, even if you haven't read a book.
she wrote 'fried green tomatoes'.
and as with everything else, the book is SO much better.

but this cover drew me in because i'm a fannie flagg fan.
promises of a quirky cast of characters suckered me from the get go.
and i wasn't disappointed. at all.

i don't want to give too much away.. but let me say this:
charlotte figg's husband, unexpectedly drops dead, and a stray dog named lucky claims her as his own. one day lucky brings home the neighbors mail, and as charlotte thumbs through it she happens upon a magazine with an advertisement for a double wide trailer for sale in a place called 'paradise'. she makes up her mind to purchase the trailer sight-unseen & that's where the story takes off.
charlotte finds herself in a world she never expected, living a life she never dreamed... and oddly it's exactly where she needed to be. she lands among a community of people who didn't know they needed her & somewhere in the midst of everyday life she overcomes a past she didn't really know was haunting her.

it's an amazing story. a funny, sometimes wacky story about a community of people with scars. some you see, and some you don't... and how they bond together.

totally worth the read, if you are asking me.

:)

what are you reading right now?
are you on good reads? if so.. friend me so i can follow your reads! :)

xo-k

1.25.2012

quoting: mother theresa

it's 1:26am, and i really should be asleep. especially considering the sleep i didn't get last night. the dude had some crazy wild hair up his butt & got up at 4am & got himself dressed for school & then came in & asked me some question, to which i'm certain my reply was 'go to bed, it's 4am.' he of course informed me he was dressed & i vaguely remember telling him 'to get into bed dressed then!' then 4:45 rolled around & i felt a tug on my hand & when i opened my eyes i nearly screamed at his face 6 inches from mine. i can't quite remember if i was having a dream, but i know it's not a good idea for anyone to be that close to you when you wake up, especially if you've been having dreams, like me, of killer bees swarming my babes, and of people robbing & burning them in walmart parking lots. (no one can accuse me of a lack of vivid dreams... terrifying, but vivid)

but like i was saying, the second wake up call came at 4:45 when he wanted to know if he could open up one of the collector's hess trucks tucked away at the top of his closet. i'm pretty sure i got my point across the second time about someone needing to be injured, or close to death for him to come back in my room & to get his dang butt back in bed, clothes & all.

and that was when the snoring started.. i tell ya.. the hubs sleep apnea machine has been a blessing. at first it was a little odd as i got used to sleeping next to darth vader (ya know.. shhh...sppppaaaa... hisssss.. that whole thing..) but once i was used to the hiss & whirr of it.. i was MORE than grateful to be rid of the obnoxious snoring. not to mention the fact that it pretty much nipped those nights that i would wake up on his boisterous inhale & hold my breath while listening to see if he would exhale. not fun times, i assure you. sorta like watching your sleeping newborn & getting right down near their sweet little faces to make sure they are actually breathing... except he is typically sporting a beard & that gives off more of a 'i've snuck into a bear den while they're hibernating, dear God don't let them wake up' type of feeling.

so there i am at 5am now, wondering why in the heck he's snoring with his machine going, and contemplating a move to the couch for the remainder of the night. at some point he finally rolled over, and the snoring quieted, and i drifted off to sleep. only to wake this time, 30 minutes later, to the sounds of the babe crying in the monitor. i suspect it was just a nightmare, but his runny nose & constant whacking at his ear may see me in the pediatricians office tomorrow, and prove it something more.

even with all that activity in the wee hours of the morning... i'm still here, waaay past my bedtime tonight, with thoughts just running through my mind like they got nowhere else to go. and i know, i just know it's this quote i stumbled upon on pinterest, coupled with the book i just finished, that has my brain playing as a racetrack with my thoughts as the cars, chasing after one another.



i couldn't tell you how long ago it was. i can only tell you that my brother was single & in college.. and mason was an only child. but i remember this conversation we had. it keeps playing over & over in my head... a conversation where i sort of half defended myself, and sort of speculated at something that has just now begun to burrow into my heart & dig out emotions i seemed to have tucked away long ago & since forgot. and i can't wrap my head around the idea that's lurking just beneath the surface, but i know it's there... and it feels like it's taunting me these days.

he was in college, of that i'm sure, because i can vaguely remember the conversation starting out as one about his schooling & the road he hoped to take... and somehow it turned to a discussion about me & why i never finished school. which is odd, in retrospect, because my brother doesn't ask much about me. it's not that he doesn't care, to be clear.. it's just. well, he's kinda like my dad in that respect i guess... figures if you want him to know something, you'll tell him.. otherwise he's not prying. (whereas i on the other hand often find myself asking more questions that i probably should out of sheer curiosity.) and i remember telling him then, as i can honestly tell you now.. i didn't finish school because i didn't know what i wanted to go to school for. i wasn't one of those kids who grew up  knowing they were destined to be a doctor, or a rock star, or anything for that matter. and i remember thinking while i was talking to him, that he was so smart, and somewhere along the line he might make a difference, that he would do great things, that people would respect him, like they respected my dad. and i told him 'ya know rick, i don't know.. i don't think everyone is destined to do miraculous things with their lives... some people just have to be the parents of people who do miraculous things' now.. don't get me wrong.. i love my kids just like any mama does but right now i'm thinking the only miraculous thing the dude is capable of is doing something the first time he's told, and learning to think of others first... and as for the babe.. well i'd just be happy if he'd say something more than 'bubby', 'bahye' or 'dadda', so that little fear that's creeping up in the back of my mind of why he's not talking at 18 months would go away.

 i suffer from no delusions that my kids are going to save the planet, run for president, or invent the next iwhatever.... but they might.

what i am saying is that feeling, bubbling up beneath the surface is one of acceptance. one of forgiveness, for myself because i have let society spoon feed me this garbage that a career & accomplishments that come with monetary gain or notoriety are more important than my goal of becoming a truly enlightened human being, and somehow trying to pass that onto the world through my kids.

i know you're probably thinking, geez get on with the crafts already, and i will i promise. but this is where my heart is right now. my thoughts are a jumbled mess, and all of this likely explains the lack of blogging. i sit down to write posts, and somehow all of them seemed forced, because what i really want to be writing about is this stuff here. the stuff in my heart. but somehow when i sit down to type i can't translate my emotions into words that make sentences and paragraphs. so i ended up deleting what i write or walking away feeling frustrated that i can't get it out of my head.

so i just need to sit with my heart & my head a little while longer. i need to take pictures and live and listen to my heart. i need to make things that speak to me, and maybe look a little scary to the outside viewer. but i know it's there.. that something lurking underneath the surface.. and i just got to give it time to get out. all while you are sitting there saying.. what the heck does she mean by enlightened?!

xo-k

1.24.2012

products i love: the lightscoop

so, remember when i said i hated that i wasn't taking everyday-happenings pictures as much?
well.. this is why.


despite the cute face & diaper-clad bottom...
this picture is horrible.
this is my living room.
the place were we most 'live'.
it has one window on the front wall, horrible ambient lighting by the front door..
and that's it for light sources..
oh, in less you want to count the sliding glass door on the back wall & the dining room fixture...
but in terms of taking pictures.. it may as well be dark in my house.
ALL.THE.TIME.

and i may have not have mentioned this before..
but i hate my pop up flash.
or i did. i should say.
i am not lucky enough to own an external flash that can rotate.
nor do i own a flash diffuser.
i got nothing fancy to take care of poor lighting folks.
but what i do have is a lightscoop.

and it has changed my feelings about my pop up flash, i'm telling ya.


(that's my one crummy window right there..)

now this is what a picture looks like taken in my house.
flashy flash. washed out skin. looks like & is a crappy snapshot.
i don't know about you, but crappy pictures do NOT inspire me to scrapbook.
or preserve those memories in photos for that matter...
they usually make me dive right for the delete button.

but take a look at this.

same settings. (ie. auto.. i know i know)
same crappy lighting situation.
the difference?
i put the lightscoop on my camera to diffuse the flash this time.
and while it may not be professional quality..
i'm telling you, it's a HUGE improvement.
i can lighten it up in a photo editing program & actually have a decent picture.
(this is totally unedited out of the camera)


i am NOT being paid by the people at lightscoop to rave about their product.
i AM telling you, that if you are a regular stay at home mama, with regular camera equipment, and sub-par lighting situations.. this item will CHANGE your life.
(okay, maybe that's a little drastic..)

the best part is the price.
i don't know about you, but an external flash for my camera would run me upwards of $100.
tack on the cost of a flash diffuser & you got yourself another $10-30 bucks.
as a one income family, and a hobby photographer..
i can't see dropping that kinda money into a flash.
the lightscoop is $29.95.
that to me, is so worth the results you get.
it's lightweight & portable.

(photo source)

you just slip it on the top of your camera.
it works by bouncing your pop up flash off the ceiling to create a soft glow on your subject.
i have cathedral ceilings & it still works well.
(it DOES not work outside, as there is no surface to reflect off of)
there are two options. standard & warming.
i have the standard.
it fits SEVERAL camera bodies.. just check to make sure yours is on the list.
it is well worth it people.
well worth it.

and...in the words of forrest gump.
'that's all i have to say about that'

xo-k

1.23.2012

project life: free printables

i totally jumped on the project life bandwagon.
it's funny, when i became a stay at home mom, i was SO sure i was going to have more time to scrap.
HA!
all i have is more time to find dirt in every nook & cranny of my house...
and then to watch it sit for a week as i mop milk from the same spots over & over again...
(or more accurately wipe, cause who can mop with a babe running around?!)

anyway.. like i was saying.. i was so sure i was going to have more time..
but it seems like with two kids, and cleaning, and kid corralling & soccer, & cooking.. etc...etc..
i have even less time than before..
i have exactly 3 pages scrapbooked from 2011.
THREE.
and that's totally unacceptable!!

but marcy penner gave me hope & turned me onto project life.
i've watched her blog as she's posted pages over the last year..
watched as she tucked in pieces of memorabilia here & there..
the tag from a new shirt.. a piece from a card game..
and i was totally captivated by it all.
and then i noticed ali edwards was doing it too..
and i just couldn't help but be envious of how they had SO many pictures of the day to day of life.
and it made me realize how LITTLE i had been picking up my ACTUAL camera.
because, i used to be all about the everyday moments..
and i had been letting them slide by....

so, i knew when 2012 rolled around i was hopping on the project life train.
annnnnndddd then they sold out of the page protectors i wanted.
talk about a major sadface.
MAJOR. SADFACE.
but... i've been working steadily on collecting items & jotting down notes regardless.
i've got my first week put together
& i'm sitting down to pull together photos & goods from the last two weeks today..
& i'm ordering copies of some free printables i found online from staples
 (because my home printer is a P.O.S)
and i thought i'd share the collection i had found thus far with you!

all of these are free printables from their respectable owners.
please follow the links below the photos for each download! :)

(action 2012 by erica hernandez @ two peas)
 
(days of the week @ creativity prompt)


(memories start here @ design editor)

(printable library, graph & notecards @ the creative place)

(DIY library card @ will knit for cake)
 
(recently reading @ pluckymomo)

 plucky momo has freebie fridays for project lifers! :)

(grid journaling cards @ pieced papers)
 
(days of the week @ yellow umbrella designs)


(days of the week @ cathy zielske's blog)

(live free: love life @ digital art by mt)

(days of the week @ a vegas girl at heart)
soooo... i'm hoping to snatch up some design A pages from amazon as soon as they come in..
i'm stalking it everyday.. even if mrs. higgins claims they won't be in until february..
because i just know all those other people waiting are going to snatch them out from under me if i don't order as soon as they are listed..
(paranoid much, ya think?!)
and then hopefully, HOPEFULLY, i'll have some pages to post once a week..
until then all my little scraps & snippets are being stored in folders..
that are SO not as fun to look at.
fo' sho!

happy monday! :)
xo-k

ps. i'm embarking on a culinary adventure this afternoon.. wish me luck...!! :) and if my labors are fruitful, i may just have something yummy to post for you tomorrow too! imagine that.. two posts in one week.. can you handle it?! :) 

1.21.2012

products i love: lisa leonard designs open circle necklace

if you've been in the blogging world for any length of time, it's likely you've heard about lisa leonard..
or at least SEEN a piece of her jewelry on someone else's blog.
i personally have followed her journey over the last several years,
and watched as her jewelry business has flourished..
and i have ALWAYS ALWAYS loved her pieces.
but.. i always had a hard time nailing down which piece i loved enough to purchase.
(there were just too many to pick from!)


then, to my surprise, i won a giveaway from epiphanie camera bags right before christmas..
and along with another amazing gift..
i won a gift card to lisa leonard designs!
to say i was excited would be an understatement, for sure.
i started right away trying to narrow down what piece i wanted.
i kept going back  & forth between wanting a necklace with my 2012 word 'believe'
& wanting one with the boys names on it,
to replace the one i had worn almost daily with mason's name on it..
before rance was born.


well, you can see i decided on getting one with the boys names on it!
this thing is hefty & solid & absolutely amazing in person!!
the front, as you see, has the boys names on it..
and the back says 'you are my happy thoughts'
i wasn't sure it would mean anything to anyone other than myself..
but to my surprise the hubs (who can't quote anything that's not 'top gun')
even knew it was from 'hook'.
but more precisely, it's from 'peter pan'.
like every mama, i love these kids more than words can express..
i wanted something different than 'love you', 'xoxo' or something similar.
and truthfully...
when i'm sad or down.. these kiddos lift me up.
even when i'm pulling my hair out over having to pick up the dvd's in the living room for the umpteenth time from the babe...
or wondering where i went wrong because i can't get mason to listen to save my life..
 they do something silly...
and i remember how truly fortunate i am to be blessed with these two little guys.
and with a sprinkle of house dust (cause the fairies are scarce in a house full of boys)..
and a few happy thoughts..
my spirits start to rise.

life is full of more blessings than burdens... you just gotta know which angle to look from.

hope you are having a great weekend!!

xo-k

ps. if you aren't familiar with lisa leonard, or her blog.. i encourage to you click on over & find out a little about her & her story.. it's an amazing story, for sure... and one that may change you.

1.18.2012

currents: 1.18.12

watching: the dude ride his bike. he went from not wanting to ride it, to teaching himself to ride it... in just a few days. he seriously would NOT even try to ride it after christmas of 2010 when he took a major nose dive off it. it sat at my mom's house & every time we were there we'd try to get him to ride... with no success (he didn't even want to bring it home). insert neighbor kids with new bikes for christmas & suddenly he's DYING to ride it by himself. monday papa brought it over & by monday afternoon he was an old pro! (check one off the 2012 to do for him!)

reading: just finished reading 'Maids of Misfortune' (A Victorian San Francisco Mystery #1). it is my FAVORITE book of 2012, so far ;)

eating: ruby red grapefruit. every morning for breakfast. i can't seem to get enough of it.. but as it's supposed to be a metabolism booster, i can't see how it's a bad thing to be addicted to!

needing: project life design A page protectors. and waiting NOT so patiently for them to come in. i've been working on my first two weeks, regardless... but i want them in page protectors already! :)

obsessing: purging. simplifying. also known as getting rid of useless clutter taking up space in our lives. there is a definite garage sale in our future. no untouched toy or shoe is safe right now!

learning: how to use the silhouette cameo. how to eat clean & gluten free. how to accept change for what it is, and embrace the new 'what is' as something just as special as the old 'what was'.

loving: this stage that the babe is in. he's learned how to open the doors in the house & while annoying sometimes, it's so funny to watch him stand on his tiptoes & then squeal with delight when he gets in a room he shouldn't be. he's using the sign language i've taught him frequently, & we are adding new words about every two to three weeks. (here's the website i'm using if you are interested)

looking forward to: my cousin's wedding in march. it's in st. augustine & we are taking just a few days prior to the wedding to take the dude to the fort there. it'll be his first trip & i am BEYOND excited about it!

pinning: healthy food. pirate parties. project life. & amazing designs.

i'm busy with the business of life. nothing particularly interesting. trying to get my self on some sort of household schedule, so i can balance what i have to do, with what i want to do. it only took me 1.5 years of being a stay at home mama to figure out i need one, talk about late to the party. i'm enjoying that lull between christmas & valentine's day, and hope to tackle some house projects in the coming weeks. right now, most of my time is devoted to figuring out this new way of eating. it's like being in school trying to educate myself on grammar, with all the can's & cant's. it's a challenge, for sure, but one so far i'm enjoying! :)

xo-k

1.13.2012

obsession: fonts

i am totally obsessed with fonts as of late.
it started with trying to redo my banner..
and ever since i've hooked up the silhouette, it's gotten worse..
sooo much worse!

here are some of my current favorites:


you can click on the links to download these free:

i'm off to pack up my scrapbooking goodies for a weekend with my friends!
have a good one!

xo-k

1.11.2012

life: i threw away my scale


i did it. i threw away my bathroom scale.
and i feel good about it.
it has ruled my life for far too long.

you see, i'm not a small girl. i'm not even a curvy girl. i'm just plain old overweight.
to say i struggle with my weight is like the understatement of the year.
i've had my thyroid tested a dozen times since i was a teenager.
i've also tried weight watchers, slim fast, south beach, & the atkins diet.
i've seen doctors & nutritionists & gone to the metabolic research center.
i've exercised myself until my limbs were jell-o.
and i've stuck with all of them.
i've dropped weight, but i ALWAYS hit a 20lb wall.
it's the same for many i suppose, that 20lb barrier, the 'plateau' as they call it.

but here's the thing.
the plateau, and the scale, are my arch nemesis!!
because i, like most people trying hard to lose weight, need to SEE the results.
i need a stupid scale to show movement, or i get discouraged.
and for me, sometimes the plateau's last for a few weeks.
and in that few weeks, something in my resolve & spirit breaks.
and i get emotional, and because i'm an emotional eater.. i EAT.
i eat all those horrible comfort foods i shouldn't.
ice cream. bread. macaroni & cheese.

and then the cycle starts all over again when i wake up hating myself after a week of indulging.

so.. i threw away my scale.
it's only taken me... 15 years to cut the ties.
15 years to change my mindset.
i refuse to be ruled by a stupid number on a scale.

so.. the change in diet will continue on, as it has for the last few months..
and the exercise will be looked at as time with my boys, or by myself..
instead of a dreaded component of dieting & losing weight.
we have been pushing towards clean eating for the last few months
& we are going to start cutting gluten out of our diet.
the whole thing is sort of daunting & overwhelming..
but i'm trying to take deep breaths & work on what to eat each day.

if i can convince stephen to cut white sugar out of his diet..
i figure i can do anything.

xo-k

1.09.2012

life: 2012 goals

i learned some years ago that making resolutions wasn't for me.
i, like 3/4ths of the population, crash & burn in my resolutions by mid-february.

but i am not immune to the promise of a clean slate & a fresh start that the new year brings.
i went back through my 2011 list, and i was moderately successful in accomplishing some of my goals.
i'd like to be MORE than moderately successful, for sure..
but i don't feel like i came into the new year a failure because they weren't achieved..
goals feel like they don't have a set end date.
you don't make it that year? aim for it the next. and the next.

here are my 2012 goals in no particular order..


i think most of them are pretty self-explanatory...
i've already knocked out 5 books since 1.1.12, thanks to my kindle & free downloads.
getting a surprise in the mail is much more fun then receiving a text from a friend on your birthday.
a 'r.a.k.' is a random act of kindness.. more on this in the coming days
yes, i jumped on the project life band wagon. i'm just waiting for page protectors!
clean eating. it's a lifestyle, not a diet. more on this soon as well!
travel florida. we can't always travel out of state, but we are fortunate enough to have a state full of great places to visit. looking forward to short weekend trips to new places this year!
i have some dreams that are stirring in my heart.. some dreams i intend to work hard to follow this year...

what are your 2012 goals?

xo-k

1.06.2012

one little word: believe

(kobi yamada)

i've been reciting this to myself for the last week. last two weeks, actually. i should have been reciting it to myself all these years... but i'm sure i'm not the only stranger to self-confidence here.

when it comes to some things, yes. i've got confidence enough, now, to rock purple hair (which has slowly, and sadly faded away). i once was so obsessed with a pair of old man's pinstriped railroad overalls that i wore them far more often than i should have, especially since they started out as a halloween costume. i've never much cared what people thought of my clothes.  i've always had the confidence to wear what i liked. i've gotten tattooed & pierced & never really worried about people looking down their nose at me..

in other ways, though, like taking photographs or baking, or making things and having people pay me for them.. my confidence is THROUGH THE FLOOR. i think the internet is the biggest culprit. don't we all browse blogs & websites feel like what we are doing isn't 'right' or 'good enough'?! measuring yourself against someone else's standard is essentially like taking a wrecking ball to the structure of your self-worth.

so, i'm saying ENOUGH. ENOUGH. ENOUGH. ENOUGH.

last year i was the start of a turning point for me. without thinking much about it, i dove into the world of thirty-one. i have been kept a float by my gracious aunt & her generous co-workers... but i haven't pursued much beyond that. i don't have a reason why, other than the thought of having to actually speak in front of a group of women i don't know... scares the hell out of me.

my friend stephanie asked me to cater dessert for her store's grand re-opening & second anniversary in october. before i even thought about it, i told her 'absolutely YES!' she has been such an amazing friend to me the last few years, i was eager to try and return the favor. (plus we all know i'm down for a good party planning ;) that saturday night i'm elbow deep in oreo truffles & thinking 'what in the hell did i get myself into?! what if no one likes the food?! it doesn't look like a professional bakery did it?! the swirls aren't just right!!' i seriously thought i was going to hyperventilate & the only thing that pulled me through was that i seriously didn't want to disappoint her. and you know what? people were RAVING about the desserts. i can't tell you how many compliments i received, or how many people asked me if i catered. i was completely taken back & flattered.

i have some dreams. some BIG dreams. there are some things in my heart i would really like to make happen. and i have let the years go by.. the opportunities slip through my fingers because of self-doubt. because i didn't BELIEVE in myself. because i didn't listen when other people said they BELIEVED in me.

i'm done with that.

'believe in yourself and all that you are. know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.' -christian larson

what's your 2012 word? i'd love to hear about your word & why you chose it.

xo-k

ps. working on the blog (like you couldn't tell..) bear with me & please let me know if there is anything you can't read/see/etc!

1.04.2012

books: southern fraud series, sister-to-sister series, of witches and warlock series

hi, there.
how are you?
i'm good. very good, actually.

i'm lost in thought in that place that seems to reside between december 31st and about the 5th of january. you know what i'm talking about? that place everyone seems to gravitate towards to reflect upon the last years triumphs & tragedies. you're there too, huh?

i have my 2012 word. i'm letting it seep into my pores & psyche before i share it, although, if you follow me on pinterest, you may already have an idea as to what it is :) i am trying to put together my thoughts on it before i share it though. it's a word that has been growing closer & closer to my heart over the last few years.

in the mean time, i've been reading. a lot. A LOT. my kindle fire is an obsession. my husband teases he regrets buying it for me, but it's given him remote control for the first time in years (aside from game days), and secretly i think he's enjoying it, though he'd NEVER admit it.

the instant my kindle was up & running i was searching through the free books to download all the classics i wanted to read... then i went through all the books that were $2.99 or less. and i ended up with 4 books that i thoroughly enjoyed & paid about $2.99 for total, one of which was borrowed.


'Absolute Liability'
 not my favorite of the four, but an easy who-done-it read in the fashion of 'murder, she wrote'.
the next book is due out sometime this year & i'm definitely going to pick it up to see how the character progresses.

'Stuck in the Middle'
 i just finished tonight. another free first from amazon, the other two books are just a few dollars & i'm certainly going to pick them up. (or download them.. i should say.. I LOVE MY KINDLE) a heartwarming story about three sisters, centering particularly on the middle child, who is 25, and stuck in her life. i don't want to give too much away. but i laughed & i cried & i laughed some more. it does speak about religion, but i didn't find it too preachy, and it's totally worth the read.

'The Trouble with Spells'
 free to download & it sucked me right in. ya, big surprise right? paranormal romance. it's actually a 'young adult' book. someone in the reviews described the two characters as rivaling edward & bella.... i'm going to duck for cover & say that i may like vance & portia more. i know you twilight fans are probably shooting death stares at me right now.. but it was a good read i'd recommend to any young readers.

'The Demon Kiss'
sequel to the above book... i think what i like is the action. the magic progresses at a believable rate, while the romance doesn't. i can handle all the 'i love you's' but knowing this is a young readers book, it sorta bothers me that it's such an all-consuming love. but, i liked the book & am totally ready to jump into the next one..

i tried & tried to get through 'northanger abbey'. i'm like 1/3 of the way in & half the time i just felt like i didn't even know what the heck was going on... whether the story was progressing or if austen was lecturing me. (did you see 'becoming jane'... i felt like the guy sitting through her short.. ha... story) so i decided to put it down & try to come back to it later.

hopefully the end of this week brings about some clarity of thought & some new blogs.. see ya then!

xo-k
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